Like Magic

I can't believe 2006 is almost over. I remember toasting with Bub and friends last year as the ball dropped. We were at a bar. My friend was insanely drunk and I remembered that it had snowed while we were inside drinking beers.

I also remember when one of Bub's friends toasted our glasses and said, "This is your year. 2006. Only 7 months to go..." And we'll be married.

And so here we are.

Now it's time for us to focus forward. What will this year bring? We are so blessed with friends, family, good health, and happiness. What more could there be? A house perhaps? A baby (I can't believe I just wrote that!), a new job...new friends...new, new, new. And so as we all prepare to ring in the New Year, I like to think of a line from one of the Anne of Green Gable's movies. Her teacher is trying to talk Anne through some mishap she's had. I think it's when she was fighting with her classmate. Was it Gilbert Blythe? I don't remember...anyway...her teacher said something like: Remember, Anne, tomorrow is a new day, fresh without any mistakes. And as I wash my face for bed each night, I like to think I've washed off the day: being late to work, the long run, and the typing and staring at my laptop while bright, artificial office lights beat down on me like fake sunlight.

And for the New Year, it is just that: new. And we all have yet another chance to find the magic.

On Time

There is hardly a soul here at the office. However, my boss is as present as ever. This is my only day of work this week and I'm happy to have that to think about for the remainder of the day!

I just wanted to share that I was on time today! I even had enough time to hit Starbucks before getting here, too. Now if I was only this motivated (knowing this is my only day of work) all the time so that I wasn't ever "late" again...

More later.

On the drive home, I pondered where my life is going. It was all very cliche. As I drove the long stretch of highway through Maryland, then Pennsylvania, into New York, Connecticut, and finally Here, I wondered where I was going. Me, my life, my character, my being. Was I happy with me? Did I exude the kindness and generosity that is expected? Was I still the bratty younger sister, the selfish daughter, who had everything? Was I grateful for good health, family, and friends? Did I recognize everything and yet, did I take each day for granted?

Instead of reflecting on these things and creating New Year's resolutions for the fresh beginning, I find myself thinking of renewal, fresh days without mistakes during Fourth of July fireworks. I know, strange. But yet, something about the color, the warmth, the middle of the year: it seems a more appropriate time for reflection. Although, I wasn't reflecting on new beginnings because New Year's is a week away. It was the repetitiveness of the road, the concrete, the misting rain, the chalky white lines on the road, the reflectors. The fog was appropriate too: the future is so unclear, yet we take for granted this very fact.

I don't know if it's the being married bit, but this was one of the most fun Christmas' I've had. Even though it was just the four of us, the banter, the laughter, and creating memories of Bub and me cooking our first Christmas meal together as husband and wife, were indescribable. We laughed all the way home, despite my feeling sick. I realized that although our paths are unclear--and that each day is something new to think about--and not purely an expectation--that I'm elated to have DH with whom to share the rest of my life.

Sigh...

I got a lot done today at work and during my lunch break. All gifts are set and wrapped. I haven't yet packed for our journey to MD tomorrow. I also need to eyeball ingredients and familiarize myself with the Christmas dinner recipes Bub and I have offered to prepare as we enjoy cooking. It may seem strange since we're going somewhere for Christmas and why would we, the journeying guests do the cooking? Well, it's just worked out that way and I'm fine with it. It keeps me busy, keeps my tummy happy, and allows me to contribute to the in-law household!

I also need to clean the car, check the fluids--yay, oil. Yay, gas. And hopefully a trip to the gym can happen since we'll be planted on our butts for 8 hours.

So...I'm tuckered out here and signing off until I don't know when. I should be able to post something between tomorrow and Tuesday, but just in case:

Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!

Love,
Ripe

Thursday morning news

Today is my "Friday"--and here are a few things to share:

-Bub wrapped my gifts last night. For the first time ever I'm being SO good and keeping away so that I do not know what the heck he is up to. However, there was most certainly a Tiffany's box with a red ribbon amongst the packages. I was squealing this morning. I was also moaning because I have major cramps. So not fun.

-I am never quite on time for work. You see we have flex time, but most people are in here around 9. If you're an engineer, I've noticed, feel free to stroll in around noon. That's a bit much if you ask me. Anyway, ever since I was younger I've been pushed, rushed, prodded along to hurry up. Work is an extension of this eh, bad habit. I stroll in around 9:20 at times. Today was 9:22. Don't worry. I skip lunch or I stay late, no problem. But when that alarm goes off (we all know it's a bitch to make it to the gym in the morning, but even if I do, that still assists me in being tardy). So please, people. Help me be on time in 2007. How am I ever going to be a good Mom when I'm the one holding people up??

-As I said, I have cramps and hate the first day. I hate it. I feel nauseous, fat, bloated, you name it. I so wanted to stay home.

-I'm 1 gift and 2 stocking stuffers away from being done with gifts. I swear. I said this yesterday. I really am serious. I need to hit a bookstore, Dunkins, and then I am really done. I always question if I got people enough. When is enough? Ugh! But our tree looks great. So many wrapped gifts and no more shopping bags lying around. We also have a bunch of grapefruits, courtesy of one of Peter's co-workers. Yay. Grapefruit!

-Since I was late--again--I am off to get stuff done. Yes, I will be productive today. I'll try to post again tonight because tomorrow we'll be in a car all day. Yikes.

Warm Fuzzies

- When I left for work this morning, as the car was warming, I heard a honk. I looked over and this woman who lives in our building who I say hello to from time to time wanted to get my attention so that she could wave. I smiled and waved.

- I got home from work first tonight, earlier than I had planned since I told Bub I was going to be late to do some shopping (I have 1-2 more gifts left, that's it!). I had good luck, so I was home 1/2 hour earlier than I thought. There were many Christmas cards waiting for us as there have been the last few days. So far, no one has mistakenly written my maiden name on any. The majority have been to Mr. & Mrs. Bub. None were addressed to Ripe, though.

- I went onto our wedding photographer's web site to see how they have updated it. The last time I looked they had some photos of us up there. They had completely redesigned it and put candids of Bub and I interspersed with other couples. I ran out of the room to tell Bub who came running after me to see.*

*The parents' albums are currently being worked on and we should see sample proofs soon... I can't wait! Then we can finish selecting what we want for ours...

Sunday Update

Since my last post I got some wrapping done, finished my snail mail correspondence, showered, folded some laundry and went to the mall. Since Bub reads this, I can't disclose the items I purchased for him, but I was successful.

I tried to avoid it, but had to do it. I finished up shopping--or should I say squeezed in one final store before departing for my sister's birthday dinner. I went to Sephora. Yes, people, I got sucked in. It started out as grabbing items for my mom and sister. I even looked around thinking there might be something small for my dad as as a stocking stuffer. What?? Yeah, no luck there. Then I caved.

I needed powder. The one I had until only moments ago was almost 2 years old. You heard me. Just a ring of makeup in a hollow black container. Gross and totally not working anymore. I will now no longer need to swirl my brush around 5 and 6 times to get something on it to put on my face. I needed mascara. I'm all for the brown kinds. The store had a great display with a diagram to help you find just the right one, but they were all in black. But if I was going to get mascara, then I needed to get what I needed the absolute most: lip gloss. But I wanted to venture into the lipstick territory. I wanted something that made sense since I'm Mrs. Natural Look.

So I picked the dark, long curly black hair, wild glasses, with semi-loud makeup--but all very tastefully done--girl to assist me with my purchases. About 1/2 hour later I'm walking out with powder, brown mascara (phew!), gloss lipstick, and lip exfoliator b/c who knew you had to do that to your lips and God knows mine turn to hell in the winter.

The funny part is, this woman didn't push a thing on me. I asked her for help with the mascara brand, the lipstick, the powder, and the lip exfoliator thing was just by chance something I needed and didn't know. Or wait, was that a sales tactic?

Anyway, that's the update. Ugh, thank goodness this is a short work week. And next week: even shorter.

Right now

I'm wearing my pj's and doing laundry. I'm about to finish writing some notes to people and wrap up all the snail mail correspondence for a while.

I'm about to start and hopefully finish wrapping Christmas gifts. Today I will finish getting everything I need to. Just a little more for my Mom and sister.

Today is my sister's birthday. We will probably be dining out somewhere this evening. I'm slightly annoyed with her. Over a month ago I asked her if she'd like to go to a spa for her gift. I would pay for her massage. Well, due to the fact that this was her gift, I was going to bum around Newbury Street while she got pampered. She agreed to the day and time and we made plans to do something after--grab a drink or meal. There was even an invitation to go to her place and hang.

I get a call 1 hour before she is supposed to meet me at my place. She says she needs to reschedule. She volunteers at a shelter and decided to adopt this kitty who has been badly injured but recovering well. I knew she was selected to adopt him and she was psyched about it. I don't want to say she was lying, but she said she was at the shelter for four hours trying to have a cage fit into her car. I don't mean to be selfish since this is her birthday gift, not mine, but hello? Why did she have to get the cat at that same time? So I say you know, I sort of feel blown off and then I get about a zillion, Now I feel so bad's. So the thing that pissed me off is that in her defense she says well, you wouldn't have had fun waiting for me while I had my massage, anyway. What???

Bub is at the grocery store now and there's so much to get done today. Christmas is only 8 days away. I'm excited for our road trip to Maryland to see Bub's parents. Blasting Christmas songs and chatting...We're going to DC on Saturday to visit one of my best friends in her hood. It should be a fun weekend. We offered to cook Christmas dinner too. I love baking and cooking and already announced to my parents that next Christmas, we're hosting! Yay!

***So I just talked to my sister. She feels really bad about yesterday. She's rescheduled the spa treatment, so we've made amends.

I'm off to wrap.

I'm currently finishing my sips of the nonfat raspberry no-whip mocha Bub so kindly picked up for me on his way back from his weekly run with the boys. He's so sweet.

So I'll cut to the chase and be done with it.

Thursday I wound up spending time with my Mom. My dad called while I was with her to say that the vet had contacted him, letting him know that Felix was not in good shape. At the most, she could see him surviving a month or less only if we did a bunch of 24-7 stuff at our house. She suggested we not bring him back home. He could no longer go to the bathroom (litterbox), and he was quite frail. So we didn't want him to be uncomfortable. We all met up at the vet to see my childhood pet one last time. He was all of 5 pounds since his kidneys weren't working and they had him on meds. He had the cutest kitty bandage on his paw. Little blue paw prints on a white background.

His eyes were still so intense. At some moments they look golden and shimmery, at others, green and clear. It was like he knew the prognosis wasn't good. He's usually a ball of energy, but he was mellow. His tail wagged often at times and then he sort of chilled. He was so, so tiny due to the weight loss. But when I went to kiss my kitty goodbye, I looked deep into his stunning eyes to let him know it was me, the girl in 5th grade who cradled him in her lap, who was so anxious to return from school, and college, and work, and then during visits--to feel his warmth, purs, and love. To slip him food scraps, pet him like crazy, give him a scratching behind the ears and on his neck.

He wasn't there. And for a minute I was surprised at the fact that I was relieved we were saying our goodbyes so that we could let this little creature be in peace and without pain.

I'll always miss him.

Felix

My mom just called to let me know that my kitty of 18 years is at the vet and his kidneys are failing. My cat, who is so precious, who has been through everything with me from the 5th grade all the way through my wedding, is sick.

This just sucks. I'm going to swipe out my plans and go see my little friend at the vet.

Lots to say

I've already had 2 cookies today (for breakfast). Our work cookie swap was a success. There was one other girl in my group with the same first name as me (which happens almost never)--we both made chocolate something cookies, so I like to think "Great ________ think alike"...

I have today OFF. OFF people. I feel sort of weird about it b/c it's been a while that I've intentionally taken a day off just because and also took it off outside of the weekend. I'm a big fan of taking Fridays off (I love those more than Mondays, when I feel like I'm always wondering what people are up to at the office, but for some reason I just know that on Friday everyone is itching to get the heck out of the office and then you have the rest of your weekend to follow). So why today? Why a Thursday??? Well, tomorrow night is my office party and I don't take a day off from work to get away from it all--including coworkers (who are nice, but you look forward to the break)--if I'm going to see my boss that same night! Plus I have a publisher lunch tomorrow afternoon anyway.

Tonight is Bub's holiday party. It's at an upscale restaurant and they've had it there for the past 2 years. It's all about free-flowing wine and very little munchies (or so it seems to me because when we leave, I'm like: Bub, we have to go get a burrito somewhere!). The free-flowing wine got me into trouble the first year. Everytime I turned around my glass was being filled. I semi-started an argument with one of Bub's coworkers about writing a book about something that had happened to him and I think I was a bit pushy (sorry!), and apparently, after the party was over and Bub and I had commit to having more drinks with this coworkers (not a good idea for me!), but intead, I just jumped into a cab--picture a girl coming out of a restaurant, booking it across the street to a cab, leaving Bub to fend for himself. Well, he caught up with me. But then I became 'whiny, bitchy girl' and so a little argument insued. I don't think it was little, actually. Wine can be evil, people.

Last year was much better. I drove, so I had no reason to allow the nice servers to keep pouring wine into my glass. But tonight I take the train. I will leave even earlier than I would have in past years to see Bub's boss who wants to give us our wedding gift in the lovely club upstairs from their office. What could it be? Hmmm.

So that's the plan. What am I doing on my day off? Well. My mom has today off too, so we may hang out. But first I have to go to the gym, finish Christmas card...make sure I know what I'm wearing to said parties. The list goes on. So now I must go. No more blogging for now.

All you happy people, have a great Thursday! : )

Tonight

I made 3 dozen Chocolate Drop Cookies with Heath Bars, Vanilla Chips, and Pecans. I started mixing in all the goodness of this recipe. I did the dutiful licking of the mixer thingy's that pop into the electric hand mixer. I wiped my lips, washed my hands, went to grab my spoons to drop the gooey yumminess of my homemade cookies for our work's cookie swap (my idea, thankyouverymuch) when I thought...hmmm...these don't seem so chocolatey. In fact, they seem so lumpy with all the chips, nuts, and candy bits. I was slightly annoyed. I'm a lover of chocolate, the brown stuff, fudge...YUM! This is when I realized that I hadn't mixed the dry ingredients with the moist. And boy, was I in HEAVEN when the two were mixed. Bub came in and this time it was he who licked the mixer thingy's (don't worry, I washed them clean after the first round of licks).

Fast forward 1/2 hour later, I have a sweet-smelling kitchen and we're off to the gym. Great workout: 2-mile run, lots of stretching (which I always neglect), good ab moves--even the hard ones--all while Bub played pick-up soccer downstairs. I could see him through the window. They wore "pennys" like you did when you were in gym class at elementary school. And I remember them being all sweaty. And I hated wearing them. But seeing Bub wear one brought me back to feeling like a kid--I remember kickball--and how fun and easy it was to be young(er), even though it was so "hard" back then...or so we thought. Seeing Bub blocking the opponent from scoring made me feel the anxiousness of who was going to come into contact with me during gym class--and how I could slip into the sea of kids and not be called out. I liked it better that way. Just blend in and I won't have to call any attention to myself, the shy girl...

Anyway, the cookies are packed away. There are even some for Bub to take to work. This time tomorrow I'll have an assortment of yummy cookies to devour...if only I could be so sure of my gym schedule.

When Bub and I first started dating, he had just celebrated his fifth work anniversary. Well, his work has a fabulous idea of giving out Tiffany gifts to those deserving of them (read: those celebrating notable anniversaries). We had probably been dating almost 6 months when he surprised me with earrings from there. I was sort of shocked that he had selected (with the help of one of his female coworkers, I hear) earrings to give to me: the girl who was always bumming around by herself, sans boyfriend, who, at the time, had not a clue that we would be here today: married. Am I complaining? No way.

Tonight I went to the store to pick up the earrings as I had had them cleaned. They had been shut in my jewelry box due to a missing earring backing--well, that's not a good enough reason--they were really, really unclean...and hadn't seen the light of day mostly because I forgot about them. I know--what is wrong with me? So I picked them up tonight and they're just like new. I'm thinking of busting them out tomorrow in place of the same little diamond studs I always don.

This year, Bub celebrates 10 years with his firm. You guessed it: more Tiffany's.

I hadn't intended on writing about Tiffany's tonight. But this is what came out. Sorry, I must sound a bit ridiculous.

I'm not sure what my point here is except that when you celebrate your fifth year anniversary at my office you get some clock (and from afar it looks like nothing grand) and at ten years--a set of book ends. Woohoo. People, we get up at the crack of dawn and spend more time at our desk doing our job than we are enjoying life and after 5 and 10 years of service we get a measley clock???? What is that?

And, believe me, I've totally tried to help Bub pick out cufflinks or a watch or something from the turquoise-branded store, but he's just not into it.

A few tidbits

Winter is totally coming. The cold weather has arrived--sadly enough--and there's no more walking outside, smelling spring and breathing in anticipation as I waited to walk down the aisle...

The summer has long been over, but now that the cold weather has made its way to Boston, Christmas is truly in the air. I listen to carols constantly at work through XM since you get a free account online if you have a subscription set up, say, in your car. It's great. I sit in THE only cube in my department and couldn't care less which scrooges hear the "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow" and "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way" from their desks. Deal with it, people. It's not THAT distracting (since I have it on the lowest possible volume setting, anyway).

We're getting our tree today. We were too cold to deal on Friday and yesterday. We're going downstairs to storage to get the cute little bobbles we've stashed away until the time presents itself in which it's necessary that we decorate. And boy, are we ready; the time has come!

We attended a wine tasting party last night among good friends, mostly good wine (too many shiraz's though!) and the whole thing was just so cozy. I love meeting friends of friends too, hearing about their holiday traditions and what's important to them. I felt there were several prods at "when YOU have kids" or "enjoy it now when you can sleep through the night" and we were one of two couples who didn't have to hurry home to let the babysitter go home.

Bub's friend who hosted the party is going to propose to his girlfriend next weekend. I stared at her a few times during the night. A sweet girl with good intentions who I think has changed the Friend quite a bit into a mature guy, I wondered how she would react. It sounds like they have been talking about it, but would she cry like I did, would she be grouchy from last minute holiday stress stuff and then feel bad when he got down on one knee (or would he?)? Would they be at their house by their tree near their fireplace or would they be outdoors, seeing the stars?

I thought back to my own special day, August 12, 2005, when Bub surprised me, and the tears, excitement and happiness which followed were the newest of emotions. Then the hard work, the fun, and the anticipation. Lots of anticipation.

So it'll be our first married Christmas this year. We've shared the holidays together for 4 years. We've been together for 5.5 years on December 21st. It became too hard to say goodbye to one another when Bub left for Maryland, but even the first year, I think we still shared Thanksgiving together because he did't travel to Maryland except for Christmas. It's a funny thing bringing your best friend and love into your family's traditions. But now it seems so natural that we've done it a bunch of times already, yet it's our first married Christmas, and we'll need to mark it as such. My first Christmas as a "Mrs."

Off I must go...to find my husband who is still hanging out in bed!

Happy Day!

I'm tired and need to go wash up.

I'm writing this during my sleep. You see we just upgraded our cable and now bub is a bit more obsessed with the tube. Not YouTube, but the television. We now have a bazillion more stations and therefore more good movie choices. I think perhaps my timing was off since we are still in deep with Six Feet Under and now this. But our DVD player is dead and watching DVDs on one's computer is not as entertaining as on the tv, especially when our computer screen is made for computer-stuff.

So as I was saying, I've been asleep already. I had seen Broken Flowers before, but love its quirks and Bill Murray, so I semi-forced bub to watch it. It went something like this:

Me: You don't have to watch this, but I really liked it.
Bub: Okay (touching the remote).
Me: It's a bit slow, but trust me, it's worth it.
Bub: (silence)
Me: You don't have to watch it, really (this is after he watched at least 20 minutes of Boys on the Side, another movie must-see--a good chick flick!).
Bub: It's interesting (but the tone in which "interesting" is said seems as though bub finds it easier to agree with me).
Me: (asleep)
Bub: Go wash up.
Me: (at the freezer eating spoonfuls of low-fat vanilla, double-churned from when bub made baked apples for my parents)
Bub: Go wash up.

Well...I have yet to wash up, but the jammas are now on and bub is still in front of the tv.

I'm just too tired to tell you about my black suit interview excursion. But here are a few hints:

I got a parking ticket after I realized that I didn't have the phone number to the interviewer since I wasn't able to work the elevator (don't ask) and thought I was going to need assistance (because who else would have such issues).

I got a parking spot EXACTLY across from my destination which is amazing during rush hour and in the city.

My interviewer lives in the same town I grew up (that's one of his 3 homes, but still, a good coincidence).

My first impression of the place from my car is that they have nice windows (I knew they were on the second floor).

My first impression after seeing the office: impressed.

I was told I carry myself well, am smart, bright, have an "energy".

I was told I would be bored filling said job. So then I got a "but we were planning on hiring XYZ type of person in the spring for this job..." and then started hearing a specific tailor-made position for me.

I got scared.

I listened.

Was interviewer trying to make me an offer I couldn't resist?

I left carrying a stack of children's books, complete with pop-ups.

Bub and I worked on the "search and find" types where you have to find the candy cane, turtle, and bug in the busy illustrations.

We didn't rest until we did.

So what am I to do?

I don't know b/c I am tired and I need to go wash up.